It is well documented that I’ve had a few stumbles over the past 8 weeks. Nutrition has been a nightmare, 1 day good, 1 day shocking, yoyo-ing between clean, healthy, delicious, fresh food and total, utter shite. Fitness wise I’ve had a fair few rubbish sessions in the gym, never quite getting the push I want, never feeling satisfied. Too slow, too few reps, bottling it on circuits, even crying! (Yes I am that slightly unhinged woman blubbing on a mat!)
This for me is a dangerous time. A lot of people will say, “don’t worry, you can’t be superhuman all the time, you’re pushing yourself too hard, relax a little”. But I am so petrified of slipping, slipping back to old habits. Sacking off the gym in favour of Corrie and a bag of wispa bites, takeaways 3 -4 times a week etc. I don’t want to go back there, I know how rubbish I felt (mentally and physically). I can’t go back there, it would destroy any confidence I have developed over the last 6 months.
And here is the crunch. I’ve got to get over this “failure” idea. Slip ups do not equal disaster. They are just a slight deviation from the path and I just need to make sure I get back to the path, at the earliest opportunity.
So after a 8 not so great weeks, I am ready to get back to the path. I’ve stumbled, but I’m ready to pick myself back up, dust myself off and refocus. A great training session Thursday helped, but even more was the session I did on my own today. I went in with the idea I’d do 11 reps of my 8 exercises (I did 10 on Thursday). But on the last circuit, I thought I’d push to 12. I motivated myself to push another rep out on each circuit. Now that might not sound a massive achievement, 1 more rep, so what? And possibly physically I could have done more BUT the achievement was mentally, pushing beyond what I set out to do. This is massive for me. I CAN push myself beyond.
So, onwards and upwards. Tomorrow I need to refocus on the food. I know I can do that and if I feel the fitness is getting back on track I “think” I’ll be motivated to get the nutrition back on track too.